For sanity’s sake…

So, as the beady-eyed amongst you may have noticed, I’m recently uncollared (again).
It’s fair (possibly understated) to say that Sir and I had a pretty turbulent relationship, but seemingly this time our chapter really has come to a close.

I loved him. Still do. And if I could go back and do it all again, I wouldn’t change a thing. The highs were incredible and far outweighed any lows, but it was sometimes so hard and I guess real life caught up with us in the end.

It’s still very raw. I imagine it will be for quite sometime yet – I have good people dragging me kicking and screaming through it all (Ben & Jerry to name but two) and there are some days when it’s just about ok, you know?

And then Fetlife happens.. did I mention we’re still fetlife friends? No? Well, there you are. He liked one of my photos the other day – I didn’t know what to do with myself. I feel like I’m being kicked in the gut when he friends submissives that are local to us – somewhat hypocritical of me, I know..

So I guess my question is: does this get any easier? Will I, one day, be able to put on my big girl knickers and deal with it? Or do I have to unwillingly erase him from my life entirely, for sanity’s sake?


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